The Real Fear of Raising a Child of Color // Ashley + Ashton // Leslie Whitaker Photography
I’ve been taking photos of Ashley and Ashton for a little over a year now. She and Ashton came by recently for motherhood photos. The photos are beautiful, but most importantly I hope you’ll take the time to read her words below.
Please tell me about your childhood. Where did you grow up, do you have siblings, etc?
I grew up in the small town of Grand Cane, Louisiana; in a neighborhood referred to as Ranchland Acres (predominantly white). I was the only child for 14 years until my younger brother was born.
As a child: Do you remember your parents ever talking to you about race?
On a few occasions my parents told me stories of some of our older neighbors and how they were labeled racist. I remember my dad having an encounter with one neighbor in particular. Firewood fell off my dad’s trailer in the ditch, in front of the neighbors home. The neighbor was outside, and as my father was turning onto the next street the neighbor literally flagged him down to come back and remove a couple pieces of firewood from the ditch in front of his home.
Please tell me about a time you feel you judged based on the color of your skin. This could be at any point in your life, or something more current.
Working in retail I’ve witnessed first hand experience. One time in particular, myself and another employee were referred to as the colored girl/woman in reference to a mistake that was made.
During your pregnancy with Ashton, do you ever remember having fears in relation to racism?
Yes, after all of the incidents related to officers killing African American men and women and getting away with it. I myself have only had a few encounters with law enforcement during traffic stops . When I found out I was having a son I feared that one day he would miss an opportunity based off the color of his skin. I then knew i would choose a name for him that if he filled out a job application they wouldn’t automatically assume he was a person of color.
People are talking more openly now ( in the past few months) about race and their understanding ( or lack of) how their actions make others feel. What fears do you have, in relation to racism, for Ashton?
I fear that one day he will be wrongful accused or even killed based off the color of his skin. I refuse to teach him to dislike or judge anyone based on how they look different from him.
Like all mothers do, I'm sure you sit up thinking at night about the things you hope for your children. What hopes and dreams do you have for Ashton?
I have no doubt that he will encounter racism, but my hope for Ashton is that he can grow up in this cruel world and be any and everything he wants to be.